Sometime in late 1987, I remember sitting in an APSRTC bus with my
maternal grandmother, going to Gadwal. My grandma asked me to suggest a name
for her newest grandson. I was 7 years old then and my the then best friend's
name was Keerthi. So I said "Keerthi". I don’t remember anything else
of this trip apart from this short bit of conversation. I don’t remember seeing
the new born baby. I don’t remember Gadwal. I don’t even remember returning
back to Bangalore. But in the months that followed I was told that my cousin
was named "Pradyumna".
The next thing that I remember about Pradyumna was that he was one of
the cutest little toddler-babies that I had ever set my eyes upon. We still
have his photo with a hat on and he looks oh-so-adorable. Unable to resist his
cuteness, my mother once got him to our home (South Bangalore) away from his
parents (North Bangalore) for a night. Next day, my mother said Pradyumna never
slept the whole night as he kept searching the house for "Mamma" and
"Pappa". I felt sorry for having kept his parents away from him for
one whole night.
Pradyumna's father -
the same uncle who drives like an artist - had a
job that made him stay in one city (or in some cases, village or a town) for
only 3 years at a stretch. So the next thing I remember about Pradyumna is him
being in
Nagamangala. A small village with a handful of houses. All of us
cousins used to go to Nagamangala during summer holidays and had so much fun
playing so many newly invented games. I being the "oldest" among the
lot used to take classes on Mathematics and act pompously as if
"I-know-it-all".
During summer of 1993, I visited New Delhi for the first time with my
mother and another uncle. It was the longest train journeys that I had ever
been on - lasting over 40 hours. I got out of the train onto the platform and
my uncle and Pradyumna were there waiting for us. The first thing Pradyu
whispered in my ear as I met him was "There is a serial called Derrick
that comes on DD Metro. We watch it daily. It is great!" I was amused that
the first thing he told me was about a detective serial which he - I am sure -
hardly understood. But it also showed how innocent a 6-year-old mind is. Sure
enough we watched Derrick throughout the summer holidays and I went on to
become a great fan of
Derrick.
Pradyumna and his parents used to stay in a 3-storeyed building on the
2nd floor in
New Delhi. The owner was a - if I remember correctly - garment
merchantman who never seemed to work. Whenever we saw him, he was lying on a
bed watching TV. His door was always open and the bed was right opposite the
door. Sometimes Pradyumna used to go to his house, rather shyly and watch TV in
his house. The only Hindi words he had learnt back then was 'Mein Chal' - a rough
translation for 'I will leave now, bye' to the owner. Snippets such
as these, for some reason, I never forgot.
There were million other moments that I remember sharing with him.
During his upanayanam in Mulbagal Mutt (family was then in Srinivasapura), he
cried like hell for cutting his hair short as part of religious custom. He was
then a high-school-going boy and hence was becoming increasingly conscious of
looks and fashion. I saw 'Hum Aapke Hain Kaun' with him and his family in a
theatre in Secunderabad and absolutely loved the atmosphere. I remember going
with him to the daily Sanskrit-sloka reciting classes in the nearby Mutt in
Lingampally, Hyderabad and what fun we had trying to memorize those
tongue-twisting God-praising words!
Then in 2003 he asked me to help him with a C program for his college
assignment. Just because people work in a software company, there is always an
impression amongst non-IT folks that IT folks will be able to solve any
software program in any software language. I was able to save my face by
successfully programming it although I was never into coding in C in my the
then new IT job. I think on that same day his father asked him if he wanted to
study his masters in US. I remember him clearly saying that he would go to US
on his own account and not with his father's help.
As the years passed, we got busy and the interactions decreased. Once a
while we used to meet in some family function or during festival gatherings.
Brief though these meetings were, it was built on the warmth of the foundation
years of our relationship.
I remembered all these on that fateful day on
Jan 21, 2012. Sitting in
my Nashua, NH, USA apartment, numb and helpless with what I had just heard, I
continued staring out on the falling snow. Snow always makes the world look
surreal. I realized that he had never seen snow in his life nor now ever would.
There were so many things in this world that he could have seen and experienced
and yet....
I being a father of a year-old daughter can understand how the news
would have hit my uncle. Only a parent will know about all those immeasurable
sacrifices that are undertaken in bringing up one's child...
If only he was alive today, he would have been 25 years.
If only...
